Heavy Metal Musings

What would I do without you all?  When I run out of words you send me a poem.  When I need a smile you send me pictures of your bunnies and laughing dogs.

You reply on my daily facebook status, you send me emails and write the best comments full of love and laughter.

An Olympic contender should have this much support.

 To honor this I have remained smoke free for 5 WHOLE DAYS!  I've gnawed on endless carrots, crunched into many apples, bit into nut after nut after nut, guzzled bottles of water, lived at the gym and taken a Zumba class, covering myself in laughter and sweat.


Everyone at work has been very kind ( or they're very afraid). I've told my pharmacist, my bank teller and if I had a piano teacher I'd tell her.

Pros: My skin is glowing.  My heart beats strongly.  I have saved 35.00 so far this week.  Autumn smells delicious.  I no longer stand outside of work smoking a Camel and apologizing to the people  walking by from yoga class.(imagine the shame?) Now I'm only outside to take pictures of flowers. Or just to breathe.

Cons: On Monday, my first day of non smoking I signed up for 40 more training sessions at the gym.  40. What the hell?  It was pointed out to me this costs less than my yearly cigarette habit. In my condition this made total sense.  So I signed.

I think that's the only con.

I thank you all. I didn't know if I could do this.  It's unbelievable to me I haven't had one puff in 5 days and I'm happy about it. I don't harbor resentment, I don't feel that something precious has been taken from me, I don't feel as if I deserve something "fun" to do. I have often felt like this in the past and plotted the day I could sneak a secret smoke.  Today I found a cigarette in a jacket pocket and almost tripped over myself getting to a trash can.

This had been edited and written the morning of day 6.  Who know what stresses lie ahead, but i intend to crunch my way through them.  And save another 7.00 in the process.